Avoid the Stupidity of Relying on Family and Friends

It usually does not end well

Be careful relying on advice from family and friends. Learn to listen and be polite in these discussions (for better or worse they are people who care for you and believe they are helping). Most of this advice is well-intentioned; but it’s based on the small sample of experiences of the loved one; and many times, the experiences are dated or heavily skewed based on factors irrelevant to you.

If Uncle Pete met Aunt Sue at Uptown College and they have been happily married for 30 years, of course they will have fond memories of Uptown. They won’t mention that it took five and half years to graduate, thanks to overcrowded classes. That they each changed their course of study three times. Or that they couldn’t find jobs for a more than a year after graduation with the crappy majors they were stuck in. They’re still huge fans of the football team!

Listen respectfully, but don’t be lazy. Do your own research and independently get to a decision. If you must, find somebody a degree or two removed from your immediate circle and push for unbiased guidance, have her dig in and do the research, play out the pros and cons of a decision, and be willing to be an objective sounding board. A tough thing to find, especially with this emotionally heavy Tectonic Decision.


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